In fact, a Columbo-like detective would be most appreciated.
I have all the details right here.
Occupation: Would-be romantic lead in The Hushing Days
Last Seen: Well, it gets a little sketchy here. I’ve never really honed in on the man completely. Never managed to sink my literary teeth into him, you understand. The man’s more an idea than an actuality. Will that be a problem?
Friends, Family, Close Associates: He’s got five brothers. Yes, all of them are “real.” He supposedly has a romantic interest waiting for him, but she’s as clueless about the bloke as I am. Pity, really. They would have made a fantastic couple on paper.
Enemies: If we’re being completely honest, I guess you’d have to put my name at the top of the list. I don’t actively dislike the man, mind you. I’ve simply had no trouble ignoring him until recently. Well, this last week to be exact.
Abnormal Recent Events: Ok, you’re going to make me say it. Fine. This past Monday I actually sat down to write him. I think that unexpected attention might have startled him a little out of existence.
Emergency Contact: That would be me again, I suppose. I wouldn’t bother his would-be missus. She’s currently making sheep eyes at one of his brothers. A little sordid, I agree. But this is the world of Romance, so what could you honestly expect?
Please, let me know if you sight the poor lad. He’ll always have a place in The Hushing Days, even if his dancing partner is no longer guaranteed.